Occasionally i become acutely aware of the temporariness of that which surrounds me.
Not in the sense of my mortality...that always hangs mockingly above me.
To the different lives I create that lack sustainability.
It almost seems, it is that lacking, that gives me comfort.
It keeps me on an edge- and my muscles constricted.
When I began to soften these said muscles, fear seeps like lactic acid and I quickly tighten and balance on my created precariousness.
This evening I walked downtown amongst deteroriating buildings, dirty swollen homeless, girls with fake innocent eyes and darting hips- webbing glances, men holding hands with trusting gals- sticky eyes upon craning necks, hipsters-hippies-hobknobbers-hollyrollers-
...and lettin my eyes glaze, i floated along
A creeping cacophony of sounds trickled on my tuned in ears.
Shuffling feet, distant trains entering town, trucks clumping through narrow streets, blasting stereos, clicking high-heels, doors swishing open and closed, rolling conversations, honking horns, barking dogs, a moon 3 days from full, laughter, and the occassional inner cry in sorrowful eyes, heard if you listen.
It was when I came to, I reminded myself this would all someday be a memory.
Thats what life is.
A series of memories
and those lucky times when you are not thinking that.
~michelle
